"Stuff"

The few weeks mentioned in the last post became a few months. Beta and I moved in to the condo at the beginning of May. We are moving out at the end of June, headed back to Pittsburgh.

The Condo, though, is clean and painted and carpeted and beautiful. We made it ready to be used again, just not, apparently, by us.

I have learned many things in the past few months, and would like to relate a few of them:

1. You cannot change your stuff until it really is your stuff.

The biggest issue we had moving things around in the condo wasn’t actually deciding what to do with it. We had a good sense of what to keep, discard, donate, etc. The hardest part was having to convince other members of the extended family that that was the right move, that no, they didn’t need an extra coffee table, nor did anyone else in the family, and that a lot of this stuff could just be let go in some appropriate manner.

2. It is much easier to make decisions about stuff when you can see all of your stuff at once.

I never knew how many of my books I didn’t really want to own anymore until I sorted them into four giant book cases and said “Hmm. This is too many books.” Now that they are on the big shelves, I’ve organized them by subject, and as such the keep/donate decisions can be made in big batches- there are subjects I don’t really care for anymore, books I don’t really need around. Also, being able to see, say, all of the books on writing, all together, makes it much easier for me to pick the best one (to keep) and purge the rest.

3. You cannot sort other people’s things for them- they have to want it.

While cleaning the condo, I also helped Beta’s father clean out his garage, or start to. But there is only so much one can do to help sort other people’s stuff. The most I could do was set up the right bins (SHRED, THROW OUT, DONATE, KEEP) for things to be sorted into, write new labels on boxes and folders for keepable stuff, and then sit with him and keep him working through various piles. Yes, there was some verbal encouragement along the lines of “ten years from now are you really going to want that around?” and “if it means so much to you, why was it buried in the garage?” but I really did very little beyond provide the time and the means for organization- it was Beta’s dad who actually made all the decisions.

4. Storage Units are a trap.

If there is any single thing that makes “stuff” grow that thing is the modern storage unit. It’s an entropy-creator for a couple of reasons: it lets you own more things that you actually have room for in your life proper; it lets you hide how much stuff you own from your psyche; it has sufficient distance as to become a sort of unknown, and untreatable, undoable black hole of “things that I regret not honoring through use.”

5. History is right about “stuff.”

There have been few times in history where overabundance has been such a problem. Such abundance used to be a dream, but with modern production, machine labor, etc, it is now a reality, and a bit of a nightmare. Some of the most prominent thinkers in history were also the most Spartan, starting with the Spartans themselves. It is only the last few generations of Americans who have had this issue with the owning of too many things in a broad, general way. Yes, there have always been eccentrics with vast collections of objects, but now it is the rule, not the exception.

And unlike historical “stuff”- hand crafted, expensive, well-loved stuff, our “stuff” is processed, identical, non-unique. And yet we treasure it as if it was. Why? If it is all replaceable (although whether that idea is one worth building a society on is a whole other article,) why not replace it? Why hold on?

I think, when it comes down to it, the happiest people I know are the ones who do not own a lot, but what they do own is a) beautiful, b) unique, and c) honored through use. Some of the unhappiest people I know own a lot of stuff, most of it non-unique, and none of it used as often as it deserves to be.

We are gearing up now to move back to Pittsburgh, with under a car-load worth of things (no furniture, etc), so expect more soon on the cleaning end of things.